Have you been cheated on?
Being cheated on in a relationship is unfortunately very common and one of the main reasons for breakups. It can cause significant damage to a relationship. Some couples are able to work past it, potentially seek counselling and they work through it, they can even come out stronger. For others there is no way back.
4 Main Types of Infidelity
There are a number of ways you can be cheated on in a relationship. These are the 4 most common ways:
1. Physical Infidelity
This is a physical or sexual connection outside of the relationship. This is what most people
think of when they think of infidelity.
2. Emotional Infidelity
An emotional attachment, bond or intimacy with a person outside of the relationship.
Sometimes known as non-physical cheating, this type of infidelity can be even more damaging than physical cheating.
3. Romantic Infidelity
Where a person outside of the relationship is "romanced". It involves being wined and dined and behaviour such as flirting.
Overlaps with emotional infidelity, but romantic infidelity is marked by the things you do rather than what you feel.
4. Digital Infidelity
Also known as cyber cheating or having a cyber affair.
These days this type of infidelity is very common as you would expect with our access to social media channels.
This also includes viewing erotic stimuli, such as pornography.
There are many people that believe that cheating has to involve a physical act, such as kissing or sex. This is not the case. Emotional cheating can be just as, if not more harmful.
You will have your own boundaries when it comes to cheating. Everyone is different. Some couples are able to get past infidelity and it can even make them stronger. For others it is the end of their relationship.
Betrayal Trauma
Being betrayed by someone who we trust, particularly within a relationship, is one of the most hurtful things that can happen to someone and it can be very hard to process.
If the betrayal involves infidelity then it leaves us with lots of questions: Why did this happen? Why were they not happy? Why did I not see this coming? Why was I not good enough?
It can feel like a double blow if your relationship has ended, not only do you have to deal with the breakup and grieve the loss of your partner, but you also have to cope with the fact that they hurt you in one of the worst ways possible.
The betrayal says much more about the perpetrator than it does about you.
Betrayal trauma is a type of trauma that refers to the pain and emotional distress that occurs when a trusted intimate partner violates your trust.
It can be caused when a trusted intimate partner engages in infidelity, either via an emotional or physical affair. It can also be caused by abuse.
Ultimately it is when a person you depend upon acts in a way you do not expect of them and in a way that hurts you.
Betrayal Trauma symptoms are very similar to those of PTSD:
Headaches
Chronic Fatigue
Obesity
Sleep Issues
Stomach Issues
Anxiety
Anger
Depression
Brain Fog
Trust Issues
It is important that you get the right help to tackle the trauma, be able to move on with your life and have healthy, trusting relationships in the future (which you will have!). Seek the help of a professional and it is extremely important to prioritise self care, particularly having a good diet and regular exercise.
If you have experienced this kind of betrayal and need help then please drop me a message.
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